Kung Fu Cock Fighter, NSFW or Anywhere

Image for post
Image for post

So what do you expect when you begin watching a movie called Kung Fu Cock Fighter? Either it is a film about a guy who teaches kung fu to a chicken or it’s about a guy who fights with his penis. I suppose it be about a guy who fights with his penis or fights against his penis, or fights other men’s penises, none of these possibilities would prepare you for watching this film. Complete removal of your eyes and ears wouldn’t prepare you for watching this film. Maybe you should just back away slowly and forget I said anything.

Watching a man doing push-ups with his penis and then spinning around like a pornographic top is entertaining but when his lover/enemy/competitor shoves a staff in her vagina and gnaws off a hunk, with what, I don’t know, and then shoots the wood chunk across the room and strikes a bell with it, you know you are in for a unique journey. After this feat she does a little qigong and then lies down, opens her legs, and lets the light from inside her vagina shine in the eyes of the pornographic top man. They proceed to engage in coitus but we are given an inside view. It is a brightly lit image of a penis moving back and forth in front of what must be a curtain of raw meat.

All of this and more is provided in the first 15 minutes of the film. The plot seems to be about a sex-obsessed king who tortures and rapes his female subjects. Unfortunately, there are several scenes that attempt to eroticize the king’s abuse of women. It’s offensive and hard to watch but after witnessing the first 15 minutes of the film it’s hard to turn away.

There is some levity but the Hong Kong film industry’s idea of comic relief is often more painful than relieving. The main source of “comedy” is the king’s minister who is a squinty-eyed, buck-toothed, assembly of racist stereotypes. He bumbles and struts across the screen trying to find more “beauties” to sate the king’s ravenous appetite. The King’s libido is fueled by his ingesting “jism pills” made from the seamen of wild animals.

The fight choreography is bad and so is the sex choreography. During one sex scene, the lovemaking is interspersed with shots of illustrations taken from Alex Comfort’s The Joy of Sex. The director just flipped through the book and shot off the pages. This has to constitute some kind of all time low for a porn film.

It all takes a turn for the better during a necrophilic, rape scene when the victimized corpse suddenly comes to “life” as a vengeful zombie/ghost and kills her assailant. The fighting picks up in the second half and there are some attempts at special effects, but in total it’s a horrible movie. Its also known as Crazy Emperor. It was made in 1985 by May Heung-Wing in Hong Kong.

As a cinephile and as a connoisseur of the horrible, I can say that Kung Fu Cock Fighter gave me what I was looking for, namely something novel. I would rather watch a horrible movie that is genuinely surprising than big-budget series of predictable tropes.

Image for post
Image for post

If you enjoyed this review you might also enjoy one of these -

Written by

I have an MFA in painting and I’m an art professor but I managed to convince the school to let me teach film. https://twitter.com/Filmofile1

Get the Medium app

A button that says 'Download on the App Store', and if clicked it will lead you to the iOS App store
A button that says 'Get it on, Google Play', and if clicked it will lead you to the Google Play store