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Feb 17, 2020·2 min read

A NSFW Summary of The Beast In Space

We open in a smokey space bar where our leading couple meet.
They have awkward soft core sex
Time to blast off for an intrepid space mission. The engine doesn’t exactly blast
Stuff goes wrong.
Gross dream sequence provides an opportunity to see more boobs!
On a smokey new planet our crew dons brightly colored rubber suits.
For reasons unknown they encounter grainy stock footage of two horses humping.
Which really turns them all on, as illustrated by this subtle acting technique.
We meet our aristocratic space villain and his hair.
He forces everyone to have a space orgy in his smokey, space castle
Then the villain reveals that he has goat legs and a giant plastic penis.
Just in case you missed it.
The whole thing turns into a close up, hard-core porn scene only a gynecologist could enjoy.
Then they all escape and have to fight the blonde golden robots with light sabers.
Time to destroy the master computer. Note the strategy in the subtitles.
Safe at last back on board the ship.

The End

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